musings.

so it's 8pm on a saturday, and i've got three more hours to go at work. i went home and got baked on my lunch, so i'm okay. though being stoned at work is only moderately better than being not-stoned, because it's still mind-numbingly boring. plus, 90% of the activity i do here involves reading, and i find that bakedness isn't particularly conducive to reading. most other things, yes, but reading like, a novel or something involves a sort of concentration and fixation that i find hard to sustain when high. but i am reading the washingtonienne archive and getting all sorts of prurient satisfaction from the sex lives of the ruling class.

anyhow, this is just going to be a hell of a lot of pointless musings over the next three hours or so. interspersed with long breaks of me doing other things. yet thanks to the glory of the written word, you won't even know that i've been gone. it'll just look like this:

and then you'll know that i spent some portion of time doing something that was not writing. likely getting food, or a drink, or rolling a joint, or frittering my time away on the internet in some non-blogging fashion (though likely by reading blogs). oh, the beauty of the paragraph. time collapses and is finally made orderly by the text.

a lady just called me parce-qu'elle voulait dire qu'elle avait toujours eu du bonne service de toyota, and it was just so special. that, more than anything is what makes me hate my job. the mindless idiot losers who rant and foam at the mouth are the ones who et any attention and for whom anything happens. whilst when nice ol' granny lady calls in because she's really happy that everything is fine, i just say thanks, and she's completely forgotten. people like her should get a damn gift basket or something. thanks, lady, for brightening my otherwise-irritable day. the squeaky wheel gets the grease, i suppose.

that's always the way, and i think it's one of those sad unassailable facts about human nature. fearmongering trumps hope, sensationalism trumps substance, and the fear of the negative always seems to trump a desire for the positive. that's essentially the impetus behind the conservative shift in america and anywhere else that a conservative shift might occur. the meek pale liberal saying "here's how i can try to make your life better" is alot less telegenic than the fat ruddy conservative saying "we're all fucked unless you do whatever the fuck we tell you! be afraid, little weenies of the world, be fucking afraid!" and then even the weenie liberals give in and say, oh no, the world is a big scary place and we need to defend ourselves against it! shut the fuck up, all of you. the only reason you guys have anything to defend yourselves against, is because other people who think exactly the way you do, think they need to defend themselves against you. your defense is another's offense. the act of 'defending' by necessity creates the entity against which all must be defended. and now the bridge has been crossed, it's been burned. when everyone is pointing guns at each other, only an idiot would be the first one to put his or hers down.

i hate having to use the phrase "his or hers." i wish that english was still elegant like french, and we could just say ils without worrying about it. i mean i know, apa guidelines and all, and i believe that everyone should be entitled to equal linguistic enfranchisement, but it's such a damn hassle, and it's so inelegant. we need a neuter possessive pronoun. i think i'm going to have a protest. a pronoun protest. and you know what really pisses me off? profs who say that it's acceptable to use "hers" as gender-neutral. feminists like that are to chauvinists what fundamentalist christians are to fundamentalist muslims. identical in all but name. (and, yeah, picky things like car-bombings, but i say it's merely a question of their respective situations and political power) oppressed groups who don't demand enfranchisement but instead a reversal of the traditional oppression.... well, they just deserve to stay oppressed until they understand the real definition of equality.

this made me wonder... who actually waits in line for a bar for that long? 1 and a half hours? i mean, 10, 15 minutes is pushing it for me. and i mean, obviously some people have to be waiting that long, or else there wouldn't be a lineup that long. not the kind of people i'd want to hang out with, though. like, you're just going into a crowded room to get wasted with your friends. why wait to go into one, when you could not wait, and go into a different one?

ummm.

that's enough.